regarding pictures

a lot of chicks send me pictures now that they know that i'll be dating pretty soon and then they write me and ask me why i dont put them on my site and i dont answer those either. but heres the answer. most of you girls are freaky and i know that i try to paint myself as being all open minded and freaky too but im not. im a pretty normal guy. usually. plus, i really have no proof that this is you and not your friend or your sister or even some kid you kidnapped. we live in strange times, i know.

however. this girl right here did everything right and i have to give it up to her. this is betty. betty has the classic black light posters and the beanie babies on the window fan and thats cool, but check out the wood paneling. i likes. also, is that a pull out bed with black sheets youre being all sexy on? i don't know if i like futon love or pull-out bed love better, but i am willing to investigate further.

betty has chosen to shave a lot off, and i have no preference there, but if youre gonna shave i dont wanna see any nicks or blemishes. that's not an area where you need to be saying whatthehellisthat? necklaces are great, bad tattoos and mascara and lipliner... fine. and the silver lee presson nails are great. perfect, actually. and real boobs. betty, as soon as you turn twenty-one please write me again. i think youre probably my soul mate. good luck in junior college.

people also seem to find it necessary to send me some of the strangest excuses for porn imaginable. please refrain. most of the time i have seen it already. im pretty up-to-date in this area. but lots of times you attach it into your emails and i just delete those right away. bad idea to open attatchments, people. if you want to send me a link - i can work with that, i will go to your site - or your brothers site. but im not about to open any attatchments and i dont recommend that you do it either.

this one girl told me how much she liked barbies and how she liked to pose her barbies in naughty situations and then take pictures. i didnt know if she got off on the posing or on taking the pictures, or sharing them with strangers ... and i havent asked her. i do remember reading how a while back the supreme court backed mattel who wanted to shut down a site that showed pictures of barbie doing nasty things - ironic, since so many lost kittens try to be barbies in the porn world - but since i never saw that site i dont know if this picture is contraband now. if it is, lemme know and i'll take it down.

i think it's funny as hell, and probably the first time that i ever got any enjoyment from a barbie doll ever - inanimate or sober. maybe mattel oughtta think about that before getting their undies in a bunch.

next weeks prediction: Raiders 28 Ravens 7