my true love is coming over. we're going to malibu to eat shrimp. im watching slacker on trio and thinking about the last craig kilborn show that i just rewateched on tivo.

kilborn was so in love with himself that it was painful to witness.

he was sel conscious that it would make you self conscious.

youd think, im not really that disgusting am i?

and how are you going to compete with conan, who is actually the best late night talk show host on tv. and the funniest. and the most creative.

and has the most edge.

why fox hasnt spent the money to get conan and put him on after the news

like a real network

is beyond me. we're going to neptunes net where the bikers are on the weekends.

surfers during the week. i had a root canal yesterday, the last day of my vacation.

it wasnt as bad as you'd think. and after i ran into an old girlfriend.

maybe youve heard of her. anna kournikova.

she agreed to walk with me to popeyes but she wouldnt hold my hand and she wouldnt let me put my arm around her.

tony, what if it gets out in the press?

i was all, you mean what if enrigay finds out.

if he broke up with me i would be shattered.

i ate the firecracker shrimp. a man in front of me had asked for free food as he had just gotten out of prison and had no money and had been thinking about popeyes when he was in there.

if i had even a quarter i would have given it to him.

you could see his plastic ID wrist bracelet from the twin towers of la county jail.

and his clear plastic bag of personal belongings.

i couldnt keep my eyes off of annas crotch area

or her breasts.

it was so ungentlemanly.

i couldnt because there i was so close to where i had been

and yet so far.

like putting dog food in the dog bowl two hours before you always do and tell your dogs no!

maybe later but not now.

we sat there and i tried to look at her devistating eyes but she wouldnt look at me.

and i said

there needs to be a day where you could have sex with any one you want,

and there would be no reprocussions.

free love day.

and she was all, there really should be.

and we walked back down the street to her limo and after awhile she said, ok you can touch me if you want.

and i said really?

and she nodded.

and i put my hand on her ass and

held it there for a second as we walked.

like old times.

bicycle mark + wisdom goof + wisdom goof's latest photo essay!

# | |

today is the instapundit's birthday

"John Kerry said today he wants to debate President Bush once a month. Hey good luck, if Bush couldn't make it to the National Guard once a month, he's not going to show up for this." —Jay Leno

"The Bush campaign for re-election has officially begun. They're actually running television commercials. Have you seen any of the television commercials? In one of the commercials, you see George Bush for thirty seconds. In another commercial, you get to see George Bush for sixty seconds — kind of like his stint in the National Guard." —David Letterman

"In Louisiana, President Bush met with over 15,000 National Guard troops. Here's the weird part, nobody remembers seeing him there." —Craig Kilborn

"The White House has finally found one guy that kinda remembers serving with President Bush in the National Guard. Now they just need to find someone who remembers Bush working on an economic plan. ... I think the White House spent more money looking for this guy than finding weapons of mass destruction." —Jay Leno

"The White House has now released military documents that they say prove George Bush met his requirements for the National Guard. Big deal, we've got documents that prove Al Gore won the election." —Jay Leno

"There was an embarrassing moment in the White House earlier today. They were looking around while searching for George Bush's military records. They actually found some old Al Gore ballots." —David Letterman

"There's this huge controversy over the fact that President Bush apparently received credit for National Guard service in Alabama in '72 and '73 even though his commanding officers are saying he never reported. I think what's even more disturbing is that he received enough credits to graduate from Yale." —Jay Leno

"Bush did have an explanation, he said he did go to Alabama but when he didn't find weapons of mass destruction, he went back to Texas." —Jay Leno

"As John Kerry sails toward the Democratic nomination, new questions are emerging about President Bush's service in the National Guard, like where he was for six months in 1972 and why he refused to take a routine physical. President Bush has vowed to get to the bottom of this right after Election Day." —Craig Kilborn

"President Bush stopped off at a bass pro fishing store to pick up a fishing reel, some line and some rubber worms. He's going to disappear and go fishing. So he must think he's back in the National Guard." —Jay Leno

"Critics are now saying that his dad got him out of going to Vietnam. However, his dad did get him to go to Iraq." —Jay Leno

"Ironically, the possibility that the president dodged his military service has increased his approval ratings with Democrats by 80 percent." —Craig Kilborn

"President Bush is not fazed by other candidates' war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one." —Craig Kilborn

"The big story now is that President Bush is coming under attack for his service in the National Guard. The White House said, 'no no,' that they have payroll records to show that he served in the National Guard. But today, the commanding officers can't remember seeing Bush between May and October of '72. President Bush said, 'Remember me? I'm the drunk guy. Remember me?'" —Jay Leno

""They are having a panel look into the intelligence failures in Iraq. It is a seven person panel and it will include Senator John McCain, but the findings from this panel will not be issued until after the election. President Bush says the commission can go off and report back in a year, you know, the same way it works in the Texas National Guard." —Bill Maher

lifted from metafilter + happy birthday prof. reynolds, say what you will, he dominates over you

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fourty six clicks



in pure digital color

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help me find something interesting in the archives of the busblog



top four best quotes, posts, or lines gets a g-mail invite

click here for the busblog search page

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Q. hey tony, how do they call it a recovery if there are more poor people?

A. because you let them call it a recovery.

i got an comment from our pal Edward from the bambinos curse inquiring about the health of our new shortstop, nomar garciapara, my new best friend.

edward was under the impression that nomar's wrist is bothering him so much that he might have to go on the DL for a few weeks.

the truth is not only is nomar's wrist bothering him but his achilles is also sore.

red sox fans like ed (who runs the beautiful sox blog and writes for fox sports new england) had grown weary of garciaparas nagging injuries over the years.

and because the talented shortstop didnt have the greatest relationship with the ownership of the red sox, especially after they attempted to replace him with alex rodriguez, some sox fans believed that some of the injuries may have been exaggerated by the emotionally sensitive infielder.

this prompted cynical sox fans to raise an eyebrow when, after the allegedly injured nomar was traded to the cubs in a four team trade where the cubs had to give away their defensively stong young shortstop alex gonzalez and very little else, he didnt seem hurt at all.

not that the good people of new england would wish ill on their pride and joy, but "wtf" probably went through more than a few minds when nomar neatly compiled a .333 batting average in his first 17 games with the cubs with three home runs, 11 RBI and two stolen bases.

the red sox, you probably know, once traded babe ruth.

and then never won a world series again.

the team they traded him to, the new york yankees, after receiving "the babe" went on to become one of the most dominant and winning teams in all of professional sport.

so sox fans, as you can imagine, get a little a nervous when they trade away their former #1 draft choice, rookie of the year, five time all star, two time batting champ who only four years ago hit .372 (unheard of from right-handed hitter).

they breathed a sigh of relief this week when nomar missed the three games in a row.

not that they wish anything bad to their suffering brothers in chicago, they just were hit with a cold slap of reality when nomars replacement (the defensively minded orlando cabrera) went a paltry 9 for 54 at the plate.

in the last ten games not only has cabrera racked up 18 hits in the last 10 games, but he's proving to be a dynamite #2 hitter in front of manny ramirez and david ortiz.

mixed with the dark joy of seeing nomar mia for the cubs for three games straight, the messages from the east coast were inevitable.

well, thank you for your concern. nomar returned to the cub lineup on tuesday, he got his first hit on wednesday, and here in the top of the sixth he's gone 2 for 3 with a ribbie and a run scored.

the cubs by the way are on a four game winning streak, mark prior is currenly pitching and winning 7-2 over the astros thanks in part to back to back homers from sammy and aramis ramirez.

we hope to see you in the world series.

by you, i mean the red sox.

the idea of nomar going up against the team that he loves and hates, in the world series playing for the cubs, a team that nobody could possibly hate, would be drama that would make shakespeare jealous.

especially if the sox had to beat the yankees to get there.

third deck + mona lisa smile + doc searls

# | |

the dentist got me out of bed today. remind me not to arrange for three dentist appointments spread out over three days of vacation next time.

in fact remind me to go somewhere exotic with a girl in a pink bikini like italy or memphis or somewhere interesting.

she gassed me, took some long needles and shot me up, and then went at it with a jackhammer. shes quite good. i never feel a thing.

afterwards i just started walking through beverly hills and west hollywood.

made it all the way to the fabulous sunset strip and still kept walking.

walked into the virgin megastore which is funny because i never thought i would ever allow myself to buy anything from a megastore of anything other than if there was really truly a place called xXxmeGAStorexXx and i got the new benny hill dvd.

fucking love benny hill.

people think it was bukowski that got me into poetry. well before bukowski i was into poetry but during a very important period of my life, my early teens, they started broadcasting benny hill on the public broadcasting station in chicago.
wttw channel eleven. they showed us benny, dave allen, monty python, dr. who, and "image union", most of those on sunday nights. prime time for anyone procrastinating homework.

limericks arent easy but benny hill was the master at them.

after i do a few things around the house, expect a review of the triple dvd edition that i just picked up for $40 out the door.

yes miss montreal called me psychicaly as i walked near her home even though she has a boyfriend youd think she would be thinking about instead of me. who hasnt gotten any since anna kornikova flew home to russia for a summer visit.

yes ashley will be on the front of my web site again very soon.

yes the cubs swept the brewers and now prepare to do the same to the houston astros who come hobbling into wrigley field.

yes i can get used to this sit at home most of the day in cut off pajama bottoms drinking beer and listening to weezer covers with all the lights off at three am ignoring the booty call ringing on my cell because somethings are way more trouble than theyre worth.

yes ken layne has returned just in time for the landslide.

yes, the president is afraid of a one armed no legged man.

# | |

more from the mail bag:

Subj: Anthony -- How can you say such things?

Hi Tony -- got my work done so I thought I'd drop you a line. I like your blog but I think your comment about the Bible not saying anything about extramarital sex was unfortunate.

But first I have a real problem with that photo of the volleyball player's butt. My problem is that I know of no guy who thinks skinny women like that are attractive. Nearly all men agree that women should have curves that are soft and squeezable. How it came to be that women decided to have butts like mens' is a terrible thing -- and it probably suppresses our birthrate too. Thank God for illegal immigration or we'd be in decline.

So you are a fallen-away Catholic. I think I know why. The culture of the Church these past 30 years has offered very little spiritual nourishment. I remember back in the 70s during ccd, all we did was color. Perhaps your experience was as lame. They didn't teach us anything about the faith at all. There are many theories but all discipline was lost after the council and the priesthood largely became the home of homosexual dilettantes. Mass became a spectacle of bad music and hand shaking. Ex-Catholics litter the land. We can agree on most of this, yes?

I'm the only Catholic left in my family. I left first but came back when I was 25 and got confirmed and all. I can put up a pretty reasonable defense of the faith if you are interested. If not, OK. We have a robust Latin Mass community here in Sacramento. Standing room only always and the average age is like 5 -- mostly because of the large families, but also because there are a lot of 20-somethings going to the Latin Mass these days.

In fact, it is the best place to meet a wife, hands down. They are hot, they are virginal, and all they want to do is find a good man to take care of and have kids. If you want to meet people who aren't hung up about sex, you have to include Trad Catholics because they do it for real, the way God intended.

Back to the main point -- your statement that extra-marital sex is not prohibited by the decalogue is hilarious and you know it. But more importantly, you say the Bible doesn't say this, doesn't say that etc. Tell me this: where in the Bible does it say that the Bible itself if the sole rule of faith? Indeed, there was no new testament for nearly four centuries after Christ. What pray-tell did all the Christians do without it? I'll answer -- they were guided by one rule of faith, the Church's. The Church put the good book together, and there is no other argument for saying that the Bible is holy except for the fact the Catholic Church says so.
Therefore, they are petty damn well qualified for saying what it means.

What say you?

I like your blog. Take care.

Eric

hi eric,

glad you like the blog.

theres not one word in the bible that denounces pre marital hetero sex between two non-married people.

no laws, no suggestions, no stories, no tales, no asides, no nothing.

if a church wants to make up their beliefs about it, like how they made up crap about cardinals, bishops, confession & all the other things that go against the new testament Christian teachings of the only way to the father is through the son then they can.

and if people wanna follow it then good for them. i just wish they would stop using the Bible as their main text and start publishing the Catholic Rulez and stack those bad boys in the pews, because there is very little in the old or new testament that explains what the Catholic church is all about, which is probably why they kept the bible in latin for so long and turned their backs to the flock.

the Bible was pretty clear at the end of the text warning against such disobediances as adding to the words of the good book.

in the Bible the Lord describes Himself as the alpha and the omega, which to me says He is the first and last word of everything, including how things should be done on Earth, but definately how things should look like in church. Never was there a mention of celibate priests, or popes acting as middlemen for God.

one of the main tenants that seperates Christians from pagans is the lack of idols, lack of pokemen, lack of individualized mini-gods that one should pray to for specific needs/wants.

everything is supposed to go through Jesus, the Messiah. everything.

but Catholics fuck that up with Saints, they fuck it up with the Pope and confession, and this bizarre idea of replacing or supplimenting the gospel ties right into the history of this church who's sole purpose, it seems, is to wrestle power away from Above and put it into the hands of men who will change its rules based on the politics of the day.

you want stories about politics and church drama and the ways of men interfering with spirituality? the bible has tons of those. (though none about pre-marital sex... interesting)

meanwhile, there seems to be enough guidelines, and rules, and stories in the Bible to live our lives by (that we still have problems living up to) that we dont need Man to throw in their two cents.

If I wanted to believe in a lower power then I would obey the ideas of man, particularly old school polish/italians who want to make up their own rules that are not based in scripture but based in their own interpretations of dozens of things.

Instead I want to believe in a higher power, which is why I obey the word of the Lord, thus the Bible.

And that is why I no longer call myself a Catholic: not because i was bored in CCD but because I actually read the Book.

thanks for writing,

Tony

in search of utopia + tech law advisor + makeout city

# | |

danielle just called, i think, in part to notify me that there are currently no pictures of her on my blog, on the blog header, or on the main page.

with buzznet going through some understandable growing pains as they relaunch and their redesigned system, i offer you the picture to the right from our danielle archives.

and now to the mailbag

Hey Tony.

I am publishing a book of my poems and selling them through the blog.

I was wondering if you could impart any wisdom about the self-publishing process, since you've put out, what, two Blooks now?

Kinkos n' mail 'em out myself? Cafe Press? I don't mind putting in a lot of work if it means the price to the reader is lower.

Any experiences you've had would be awesomely helpful.

Thanks.

- DC Pierson

dear dc,

i have self published five books of poems and one blook. they are both very different things to make.

the easiest form of selfpublishing are poetry chapbooks.

alot of my poems are pretty short, so i was able to take an 8.5" x 11" standard peice of paper, fold it, and get two poems per page going.

that means if you have 30 good poems you'd only need about 22 pages to put together a nice little chap book. once you have all the pages printed out and copied, you staple it in the middle with two staples, fold them and mail em out.

total cost about $1 a chapbook.

Blook was harder because each one was 125 pages, so i went to a copy store and had them bind it with that crappy plastic binding that made it look like a college reader.

total cost about $9.

i will be coming out with a new blook hopefully soon.

i plan on doing it through Cafe Press because it will make something that not only actually looks like a real book, but they will collect the money and deal with the shipping and everything.

even though i sold about 150 Blooks within about 4 weeks, i made very little if any profit and it was a royal pain.

cafe press is a reputable company that has already given me one commission check from my lame ass merch store that i set up with them, it seems reasonable to think that i could write something, put it in .PDF, email it to them and have people buy it through the blog.

we'll see.

good luck on your book!

tp

sk smith + danielle + mc brown

# | |

Would That It Were
John Kerry on the Daily Show
comedy central, 8/24/04

i'll admit im a ignorant blowhard at times. a jackhole who talks out of his ass. a beligerant predictable fool who knows as much about politics as macrobiotics, but i can tell the difference between a retard and a dullard

and so can america.

the interesting thing is how much of this country backs the tard no matter what just because he's wearing their gang colors.

i feel about george w. bush the exact same way that i feel about sammy hagar in van halen:

i realize some of you fucking frat boys just need someone to nod your head to, but this isnt even good.

know that every time you tell me that george bush deserves four more years running this country, all i hear is "sammy haggar deserves to make four more records with van halen."

and i want to slap you.

and it makes me know that you're high on something.

and then i become jealous.

and then i want to slap you.

john kerry was on the daily show last night and the man is no clinton.

hes stiff, hes softspoken, hes awkward, he sounds like someones dad, he looks like he's gonna fart any second, and the pressure of possibly losing to one of the dumbest and least-successful presidents of all time has got to be a motherfucker.

id suggest that the dude lighten up, but the scary thing is i think he is lightened up.

which isnt that scary, really. call me crazy but i think i could deal with eight years of a boring serious dude who isnt in bed with the saudis. i think i can live with the price of ketchup going up the way oil has under the bushes for example.

everyone is all, fuck the medals fuck the national guard records fuck nam and cambodia, lets talk about the real issues.

fine then

gasoline is a real issue that pretty much everyone who doesnt ride the bus has to deal with.

gasoline is so fucking high that when it drops to $1.89 people are all "whooo-hooo, lucky day!"

its almost as though people know that when your president's family are oil people then you're gonna get screwed at the pump when hes in office.

its almost as though it went up and up and up until people almost couldnt stand it and then it sank down to a reasonable gauge that people dont even murmer about and thats where it stays.

john kerry was on the daily show last night and he was pretty dull. he tried to laugh at the very funny john stewart but he was obviously afraid that if he did he'd fart and he didnt want that.

stewart knew that he would ramble into his stump-points and the following exchange took place:

STEWART:
Now how-- how are you holding up? This has been a-- it's been a rough couple weeks. I've been following-- I watch a lot of the cable news shows. So I understand that apparently you were never in Vietnam. (LAUGHTER)

KERRY:
(LAUGHTER) That's what I understand, too. But I-- I'm trying to find out what happened.

STEWART:
Exactly. It's nice, though. I know-- 35 years ago I have friends that have come forward and say-- you did have cooties. You know, that sort of thing. (LAUGHTER) Is it-- do you-- do you-- is it hard not to take it personally?
Is it a difficult thing not to take personally when-- when they come out and-- and your word, it's-- it's in the public files. So--

JOHN KERRY:
You know what it is, Jon? It-- it-- it's disappointing because I think most Americans would like to have a much more intelligent conversation about where the country's going. And-- (APPLAUSE) yeah, I think that-- you know, and-- and, yeah, it's a little bit disappointing. But believe it or not, I've been through worse. (LAUGHTER)

STEWART:
Right. I-- I can imagine. When-- when-- these guys-- were you surprised at all that--

KERRY:
No.

STEWART:
--they-- that they-- that they--

KERRY:
Sure I'm surprised. But surprised in a sense. But now that I begin to see the web and the network, I'm not surprised. I think-- you know, it's politics. And for whatever reasons, the-- the-- and I think Americans will discover it as we go forward in the next four or five weeks, George Bush doesn't wanna talk about the real issues. I mean, what's he gonna do? Come out and say we lost 1.8 million jobs?
Four million Americans lost their healthcare. We're going backwards on the environment. We-- angered everybody in the world.

STEWART:
Sir, I'm sorry. Were you or were you not in Cambodia on Christmas Eve? (LAUGHTER) They said-- you said five miles. They said three. (LAUGHTER) (APPLAUSE) No, I-- I think that's a very interesting

it was very funny.

thing was, what started as a joke (Stewart sarcasticaly ambushing Kerry with the question of the day) actually could have been journalism if Stewart had waited a tick.

but because it was a comedy show, when the president didnt have a snappy, funny comeback (or for that matter even sense the humor and sarcasm) jon stewart bailed the nominee out.

theres no question that sen. kerry appeared on the show because it would be a softball appearance the same way the president and the first lady were on larry king, a way to get on national tv in a cozy warm-fuzzy manner.

not only did stewart miss a great opportunity by letting kerry answer the question, but the would-be president missed a greater opportunity by not having an answer ready for a sure fire slam dunk in such a friendly confine as the daily show.

but this is a man who isnt quick on his feet like bill clinton

and knows that theres a time and a place for everything

and i would wager that even if kerry did have a good comeback, it would be in his best interest to keep it in his pocket until the proper time and place,

because if the bush administration thinks that the best way to convince people that america needs george bush is to focus on john kerry's vietnam record

then it's in john kerrys best interest to make them feel comfortable in their lunacy.

im ready for eight years of a boring steady safe chunk of rational leadership.

which would lead nicely to a hilary/barrack ticket sure to bring back the drama that we would yearn for.

complete trascript via wonkette

# | |

its 5:08am. you know that youre on vacation when you can type that without a care in the world.

i am starting to see that this is the way civilized man lives.

stay up all night, wake up late. roam around. enjoy all the room on the busses in the afternoon.

smile at everyone else who isnt working.

this is how it should be done.

i worked in the morning on the photo essay, i worked when i got home. i would call that contributing to society.

way more than whoever the fuck makes marmaduke.

everythings marketing.

in the mail today i got a post card from ms raymi the minx.

i also got some art from an anonymous sender

im pretty sure i know who it is.

i procrastinated a lot on that photo essay.

i thought this morning i was gonna have it done but when i came home i worked like a good 3-4 more hours on it. so many pictures to go through. then you have to optimize them. yes, those are optimized. still huge, i know.

bought a lottery ticket with four quarters.

seventy five million dollars what the jackpot is.

i would go to the bank and get bag fulls of $2 bills, and i would walk down the street and ask people if i could give them a $2 bill for a picture.

and then i would take their picture and i would put it on my blog.

i would then collect the best pictures and make a photo book and sell the book with the proceeds going to charity, etc.

why didnt the cubs get larry walker?

i almost saw a movie today.

called miss montreal like four times but she had left her phone at home.

my entire childhood would have been different if i had had a cell phone.

or a blog for that matter.

five twenty one am. this is why the good lord doesnt let me stay up this late.

saw this deaf couple yell at each other today because a guy in a wheelchair was trying to get around one of them.

the one who understood kept waving his arms around

but the other one wasnt looking

and the wheelchair guy had his hand on the joystick waiting to push forward but the opening wasnt coming.

i sat there listening to duke ellington on my ipod completely spaced out to the universe

just laying back cuz my stop isnt for a good three stops.

and what the hell am i gonna say to a deaf lady.

my post on metafilter + got discussed on metatalk, the politics are fascinating but it all leads to a clean and reliable discussion group + roger avery, quentin t.'s cowriter on pulp fiction says q isnt blogging here + layne says its real

# | |

sunset junction street fair 2004



53-page photo essay of love

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buffalo 66 is one of my favorite movies. vincent gallo is the man. people think i work at this tv station but i dont. one of my best friends works there and i used to hang out there a lot. once he showed me this long rant that vincent went on about mickey rourke and all these other actors. he basically called all these other actors fakers except for rourke.

im the biggest faker there is. this chick asked me about this blog the other day and said that she read in an interview where i said that i hold back a lot. i said, yes i do. i self edit like mad. theres a damn muzzle on this thing. shes was all, i would never know. i said its sad and true. she said then let go let it out and i said do you really want to read 20 posts about baseball? fantasy baseball? followed by 20 posts about fucking two mexican girls, one of whom translates this blog and puts it on her livejournal page.

the girl said i would skip over the baseball stuff. i said everyone would skip over all the stuff and if i ever wanted to get hired by anyone one day they would think i was a mad man.

when in chimed her sister who said, yeah when i found out i was going to meet you i thought you were going to be this pissed off angry bastard with a chip on his shoulder, but youre so mellow. soooooo mellow.

which i am. so i told her thats why you have to be careful about what you read and how you read it.

what are the agendas of the writers. whats going on for them. what are they selling. what ideas are they trying to shove down your throats.

the one said the la times doesnt have an agenda.

and i laughed so hard the horn section of the mariachi band asked me to take it down a notch.

today i took a bus through beverly hills. i was to have a root canal. my dentist had referred me to this guy who was two blocks away from rodeo drive. the strangest thoughts were going through my head. fine way to break out of being a cheapskate finding the Most expensive specialist you could probably ever get caught up with?

he sat me in the chair, took an xray and told me to come back on friday cuz we had gotten a "late start". the dude was super tanned and had bright white teeth.

a slight massachussettes accent.

afterwards i sat in the jack in the box on fairfax and edited something that i want to publish and i was shocked at how much it didnt suck.

and one day i will have the courage of anti and gallo and raymi and bukowski.

does quentin tarantino have a blogspot blog? (buzzmachine via adrants)

# | |

today blogger turns 5 years old. happy birthday baby.

i started blogging almost exactly three years ago.

i had what i thought was a great website, but nobody was reading it.

alot of the more interesting pages that i was seeing on the web were blogs written by cam girls like nay, chelle, mindy, and frosty.

even though i had way more happening on my web page, unless i had a blog that sorta looked like a blog, i wasnt going to be taken seriously. it was weird and i didnt want to start one.

my first blog post in july of 2001 was a thumbnail of what was on my main page, as were the next half dozen.

by august i still wasnt that into blogging. just write? how simple. what about design and technique and creativity and photography and photoshopary and big full screenery? who wants to just read words on a friggin page?

Thursday, August 02, 2001

i know i havent updated my blog recently.
i have a love/hate relationship with my blog.
except not a lot of love.
oh well.
hi.

Friday, August 03, 2001

hi blog. i still dont like you.
last night karisa danced with hef and his ten girlfriends.
she said he danced a lot. she was impressed.
tonight we're going to the Cubs/Dodgers game.
kerry wood versus chan ho park.
i think we have front row tickets.

who would have thought after reading that lame start that i would not only like my blog, but love it? certainly not me.

but then a very strange thing happened in september of 2001.

hank the angry

drunken

dwarf

died.

it was then i knew that i had to take control of my own life. short as it was, life wasnt going to just roll with me, i had to roll with it, and if blogs were what the kids wanted to read, and if i wanted to get read, then a blog i needed.

since then its been nothing but money bitches and problemz.

my biggest problem is that i love my phone number and the phone wont stop ringing. a normal person would just change it but i refuse to give in to people i dont even know.

the other problem is all the email i get. damn you blogger!

and then of course there is the addiction. terrible addiction. like a bottomless pit of hawaiian punch with a perfectly cold ladle. every time you walk past that pit a deep sip from the ladle is irresistable.

since i started my blog, it's true, i had a secret Open Diary blog. it was easy to be kept secret because Google didnt spider it. if i was Blogger i think it would be real nice to offer the No-Spider feature on "private" blogs.

some of my favorite bloggers continually write cryptically so as to avoid the all-too-accurate bots at Google, and how liberating the writing would get for those authors who have things to say but wont say it because of the nature of the beast.

over the years i have met lots of people because of blogger, i have found myself in ridiculously fun places because of blogger,

and its kept this brotha off the streets.

for those reasons i remain loyal. i know about the other software deals out there. some of my best friends use them. even the instapundit bailed after mooching free bandwidth from blogspot as he became famous.

but i have always believed that people give reward the wrong people when they jump ship for the newest sparkley thingamabob when the old thingamabob works just fine.

take it from me, a man who rides the bus in la

and then blogs about it.

happy birthday blogger.com

my favorite web-based publishing solution of all time.

congrats ev, jason, jason, jason, eric, biz, kimmy, graham & steve

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i took over 800 pictures yesterday at the sunset junction street and art fair, my favorite gathering of the year.

its located about ten steps from my front door and yet on saturday i sorta milled around and contemplated entrance and then chose to go home and have phone sex with a college girl instead.

what are you wearing, she asked.

flippers and a snorkling mask, i said all sexy-like.

anything else? she giggled.

a diamond pinky ring, tommy pajama bottoms, and a dirty smile.

juilette lewis very well could have been the nasty talking girl on the other end of the line the other night.

she and her band the Licks took the stage on sunset blvd sunday and made sure the sabbath was kept holy.

it was full throttle punk rock. the kind that pj harvey and that chick from the yeah yeah yeahs have been trying to bring back.

big. yeller. different.

she dressed great, she sang great. the songs were unique and raw and emotional and rocking.

she blew everyones minds who were just there to see the movie actress make a fool of her self. but it was we who were made the fools of for we were the fakers the hipsters, we were the ones who money could buy. not her.

she crawled around the ground but not for show. cuz she was horny. she licked at the guitar players guitar not to tip the hat of david lee roth but because she should have licked that guitar.

she bent her back and stuck her ass out cuz she has a nice ass and a curvy back.

she danced around and whipped her hair with her arms out like the polyphonic spree on speed cuz it was a weekend in hollywood and we were alive but she was fucking on fire.

made me forget all about the fact that the night before karisa was partying with the donnas blocks away from the xbi and she was too drunk to call me even though my number is the easiest in the book.

tonight i will put up a photo essay.

now i will get an angus burger and pick up some pornography that the phone sexer sent me via federal express.

im on vacation and the days melt like chocolate.

kitty bukkake was there + as was mc brown + licks mp3s are here

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the daily kos via DU questions the president's medals
half of which might not even be his

and the lack of two medals might be further proof that the dubya didn't fulfill his duty in the national guard.



Top to bottom, left to right as you look at them.

Kerry:

Silver Star (Verified via DD214)
Bronze Star (Should have Bronze Combat "V" Device, Verified via DD214)
Purple Heart (Should have two Gold Star devices for subsequent awards, Verified via DD214)
Combat Action Ribbon (Verified via DD214)
Presidential Unit Citation (Verified via DD215, worn above left pocket per Navy regs)
Navy Unit Commendation (Verified via DD215)
National Defense Service Medal (Verified via DD214)
Vietnam Service Medal(Verified via DD214, w/four bronze star devices verified via DD215)
Republic of Vietnam Gallantry Cross Unit Citation (Verified via DD215)
Republic of Vietnam Civil Actions Unit Citation (Verified via DD215)
Republic of Vietnam Campaign Medal (Verified via DD215)

Dubya:

Air Force Outstanding Unit Award (verified via photograph only)
Small Arms Expert Marksmanship Ribbon

kos + democratic underground + buzzmachine + kerry & bush's military records side-by-side

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raymi explains blogging



on video

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hi vacation

hi tony, what are you going to do with me?

im not gonna go to work thats for damn sure.

i know but are we going to go to some far off isle or swimming or camping or exploring or touristing?

uh

are we going to go to canada where because of the terrorists the price of weed has dropped significantly because they have a hard time sneaking it across the border and therefore theres far too much supply and not enough demand

uh

are we going to go to new york city and blog about the rnc convention, and see first hand if indeed our president is a retard, im sure you could get credentials, youre tony pierce, this is the busblog!

uh

are we going to go to chicago and watch the cubs on their march to their first world series championship since 1908

cubs are out of town

are we going to go to where the cubs are?

uh

are we going to go to a movie every day during your vacation and review them all?

uh

are we going to get laid on venice beach by a new tourist chick each day?

we?

are you going to start a novel?

uh

are you going to campaign to get your link higher on the google search for the word tony?

oh hells yeah.

are you going to have guest bloggers fill in for you while you rest your sore hands?

my hands arent sore.

are you going to shoot pool with flagrant at yankee doodles on the promenade?

hahaha!

are you going to go to vegas and live a week of sin followed by salvation?

uh.

please dont tell me that youre just going to sit around your house with a bottle of rum and watch tv and waste your vacation reading all the blogs on the innernet

i plan on having more than one bottle of rum

i hate you.

i will be hanging out with karisa today at sunset junction, like last year.

i love you.

you should.

when tsar played sunset junction + when sonic youth played sunset junction + mc brown's pics from 2002

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