tony + mary!
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nothing in here is true


   Tuesday, March 28, 2006  
ddt did a job on me, now iam a real sickie. im sick again.i dont know how this happened. maybe it had to do with the drinking on saturday. maybe it had to do with the crime fighting last night. mc brown doesnt know that ive been xbi this whole time and it hasnt been effecting buzznet until now and now i feel bad and guilty. deep down i think that the illneesses have been xbi related in that theyve gotten me sick on purpose so i can see their doctors because nonxbi doctors would freak out if they saw my xrays what with all the chips in my head and ass and arms and heart.

im lojacked like crazy. people always know where i am which is why if im not on assignment or at buzznet i stay at the house. or my underground lair.

but i dont want to go to the xbi doctors. i dont trust them. im happy at buzznet an i know theyre not. they want me back at e or somewhere like e where there are international communication systems omg i just puked for no reason.

it was so weird. i was typing and then there was this sudden feeling from inside my gut that said head for the head. it was like there was the Alien in my stomach and there wasnt anything but snot in there.

was it something i burned in my fireplace last night? the newsprint of the newspapers? was it bad wood?

maybe it was the rain. lets blame it on the rain.

either way im going to have to sleep this off cuz its ridiculous and theres lots of work that i need to get to at buzznet when i wake up. but first i want to weigh in on the half million mexican march that took place this weekend here in LA.

firstly i have no problems with mexico, mexicans, or mexican culture. and i realize that this town is called Los Angeles, not The Angels. this is mexico. this city is the second largest spanish speaking city in the world next to mexico city.

with that said, we have laws about how you emmigrate here and how you get your papers. you cannot just bum rush the show. i know what the statue of liberty says but theres an asterick there plain as day. that torch that she holds is the asterick.

yes it says bring me your tired your hungry your huddled masses yearning to breath free but the asterick says but get in line bitch. and im sorry but mexico might be fucked up but its not some totalitarian commie country. the way to fix mexico isnt to let tens of millions of mexicans come here to pick our fruit nanny our white children and hang outside the home depot.

the way to fix mexico is to legalize weed down there and start opening up mexican restaurants around the world. starting in spain which have no good mexican food.

there are unemployed people here in america. its not like everyone has a job here. and if people dont want to pick grapes for $10 a day maybe they shouldnt pick grapes for ten dollars a day and maybe the cost of grapes should go up or maybe someone should invent a machine that picks em cheaper.

hate to say it but we put a man on the moon and we have figured out how to turn ocean water into drinking water, you fuckers can figure out a way to pick grapes so that we can still enjoy our three buck chuck and if you cant omg five buck chuck isnt going to criple the republic. but 11 million undocumented workers suddenly allowed to be documented just might.

only reason bushie wants this to pass is cuz he a)doesnt care about black people b)thinks the mexicans will vote for him and his ilk if theyre allowed to vote c)thinks that the way to run businesses is to exploit poor people. im sorry bro but if those people are american citizens they should not only have a minimum wage, but a living wage. if you fuckers can spend $100 million on iraqi propaganda and $3.7 million on pajamas media, you can figure out a way for farm workers to be able to make enough in a day to get dinner at night.

im sorry for all the people who marched the other day, but marching and being hard working doesnt mean that youre right. youre not right. bank robbers or child molestors can take to the streets too for all i care, theyre not right either and just because theres a lot of them or their hearts might be in the right place doesnt mean that i have to agree with them.

people make amazing breakthroughs when they have to. people do not have to break the law and move to america to have good lives. people can make their own countries good. plenty of weed and mexican food can get made in mexico. export that shit. turn those sexy tv shows into american sexy tv shows. learn english and broadcast that shit in english. you guys can build anything, build baja into the next bajamas. americans are dying to give you money and drink your tequilla and europeans are tired of the grand canyon. build a tropical paradise in your tropic paradise. but coming here is not the answer.

legalize weed and prescription drugs and cheap hospitalization and dentistry and automotive upgrades or learn how to be the best plastic surgeons in the world. being our busboys isnt going to help anything. i mean it. and i say this because i love you and i want bigger things for you than what is here. there is very little here for the hard working except heartbreak. the asians work their asses off and theyre not respected, the women work their asses off and theyre not respected. whats respected here is when people can do it on their own. self reliance.

make mexico more beautiful. dont fall for the american dream because cleaning someones house or working in the chemical-laden heat of the farms in oxnard is not the american dream.

and finally, if you want to convince us that you love the USA and this isnt a plot for Mexico to take over, raise US flags when you march in LA, not mexican flags. we love you and your flag but it gives those who support you the willies when they see a foreign flag being raised from people who are demanding entry - illegally.

ryan mcgee + randomary + kira + jarvis reporting that saying bullshit on tv is now illegal

Previously on busblog...