tony pierce.com + mary!
busblog at gmail dot com

nothing in here is true

 


   Wednesday, May 13, 2009  
testes
 
duanes a genius

   Tuesday, May 12, 2009  
five minutes with tony



in five minutes i have to go to a very important meeting. then i have two important phone calls. later today i have some important drinking to do. which give this my only time to write inside this important blog.

as the N2O was on my face my dentist sighed that he was sad that i dont write political stuff any more and i was all gahhhhhhghghh and he was all like for example how do you feel about the miss california controversy. and i was like ghahhhh hghghhgh ghhahhaaha.

i wonder what it would be like to perform super intense dentistry while trying to have adult conversations with people flying high on gas who cant really speak clearly to begin with?

my answer after the gas was turned off was, "it was pretty much a no-win situation for the woman. and the question should have been taken with as much seriousness as if she had been asked 'do you like oranges or apples better?' judgement should have been reserved for not what her answer was, but how did she answer it."

which of course was the correct answer, and i was named miss california right there in the dentist chair. donald trump came out and everything.

ok its 2pm, go check out our Comments blog and read all the differing opinions in regards to Wanda Sykes vs Rush Limbaugh, etc.
 
i hafta go back to the dentist today to get some cavities filled



hopefully they still have nitrous oxide there.

   Monday, May 11, 2009  
two best videos of the weekend



dick prefers rush over colin



bababooey is a ma ma met fan
 
today is my first girlfriend ever mary's birthday shes 25.

mary taught me a valueable lesson - always tell the hot babe that you love that you love her. i loved her in freshman year of high school i loved her in sophomore year of high school and when we were juniors and she told me that she was gonna move to california i was all omg i better make a move on her and tell her that i lover or i will never get the chance to do it.

so i took her to a hockey game but a fight broke out and i had to jump on the ice and help my friends and i got a bloody face and i couldnt move my mouth to tell her what i had been sitting on all these years.

so then i took her to a movie but the film was so good that i thought about it as i drover home and when her pa turn on the driveway light she ran inside.

so then the next week i tooker to another film and it was good but not great and as i was driving her home i said a little prayer which ended thusly, "lord if i should make a move on this six foot blonde, please send me a sign" and a cow being carried off by a tornado skipped across us and into the Illinois cornfields so i said "any sign at all" and the play-by-play part of Meatloaf's "2 outta 3 aint bad" came on, and i said no really any sign and i will do it

and then tom pettys break down played on the radio and i veered over in a ditch and i jumped on her and it was my first non-spin-the-bottle kiss with a girl and it was magical. and for the short period of time that she was still in IL she was my gf.

she moved to california which might be a secret reason why i moved here the day after high school (ya think?) and we lived happily ever after.

not really but lets pretend that thats what went down.

mary is now in san diego with her two beautiful sons, where she has lived for quite a while and we talk once a month and exchange fruit baskets at christmas. the end.

happy birthday mary!
 
rock stars want to be movie stars, movie stars wanna be singers, but poetry major bloggers wanna be scientists

seems like im always interested in experimenting with things and investigating things and poking things and trying to blow stuff up to see what it smells like.

likewise i am fascinated by things that have no absolutes, no rhyme, no reason, no science at all attached to them. art, music, poetry, and definitely love.

my truest came to town this weekend to go see star trek with me and it was amazing, then we went to see monsters vs aliens yesterday afternoon and it was so not amazing, but the most interesting part was the way i feel when im around her.

i know theres no chance, no hope, no possibility between us any more. i am on her short list of no way - no how in the relationship game. but for some reason my heart couldnt care less. its a lot like pepe le pew. i know shes a lovely cat and im a dirty smelly skunk but my heart only sees rainbows and unicorns and waffles.

and melting butter

and long glorious slowmotion pours of maple syrup from an endless mini-pitcher of sweetness.

wait, where was i?

right, love.

something about this girl makes me get all crazy in side. not crazy enough to do the dishes or clean the house, but crazy enough to want to write a book about the odd phenomenon that she inspires in my heart and gut and large intestine.

yes a book about love.

i said please move to LA and let me examine this nuttiness, let me explore the depths of the one thing that makes this world truly spin at a cockeyed angle, let me discover what no man or woman has been able to answer definitively: the meaning the purpose the rational of the most dangerous and most powerful four letter word around.

and then let me write a big fat book about it that inevitably will get turned into a major motion picture starring that dude from crash and hustle and flow as me, and drew barrymore as you.

and she didnt say yes, america,

but she didnt say no either.
 
leah and taylor are now parents!



as many of you may have known, Leah has been one of my favorite bloggers ever since she was 15(!), which should be weird enough, but this weekend she delivered Harper Lennon and of course she blogged about it even minutes after it happened.

heres an excerpt of what she wrote this morning:
At 10 PM on Thursday night, a nurse came in to check to see if I'd made any progress. As she walked in, she said that I would either go naturally and deliver the next day or be induced Friday morning. I was upset because I wanted to be induced then but was hoping for some change when she checked. As she uncomfortably investigated what was going on down under, I heard a weird sound- felt a weird feeling- and officially freaked out. The nurse had accidentally broken my water, something that she was trying not to do, and everything changed immediately.

The contractions that I'd been feeling, while not fun, quickly picked up in intensity and time. The nurse said that everything was about to start happening quickly, no induction was neccessary, and basically- let the games begin!
a hearty and warm congratulations to Leah, Taylor, Quiet Company and all of Austin from those of us here on the west coast!

photo by Taylor