tony pierce.com + mary!
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   Friday, September 17, 2004  
i dont know too much about the jewish religion.

i know that yesterday and the day before was rosh hashanah, maybe today is too, but i was too busy at work to ask what that holiday is all about.

but i do know that whenever theres a jewish holiday here in holiday you are instantly aware how many jewish neighbors we have, because the streets and the busses and the subways are empty.

empty i tell you, and it's nice.

for example, usually madonna (pictured) is at the hollywood and vine subway station doing yoga poses against the coke machine while waiting for the train, but during this holiday apparently she is in temple.

i think these holidays are nice. i think all spiritual holidays are nice as long as they remain peaceful. and i think all of us commuters in LA are happy whenever the roads are clear, for any reason.

so in honor of my friends of the jewish faith, especially my buddy jeff solomon and dan kern in tsar, i give you adam sandler's "Chanukah Song Pt 2",

for no other reason than he doesnt have a Rosh Hashanah song.

yet.

Put on your Yamaka
Its time for Chanukah
So much funnaka
To celebrate Chanukah

Chanukah is the festival of lights
Instead of one day of presents
We get eight crazy nights

When you feel like the only kid in town
Without a Christmas tree
Here's a new list of people who are Jewish
Just like you and me

Winona Ryder,
Drinks Manischewitz wine
Then spins a Dreidle with Ralph Lauren and Calvin Klein

Guess who gives and receives
Loads of Chanukah toys
The girls from Veruca Salt and all three Beastie Boys

Lenny Kravitz is half Jewish,
Courtney Love is half too
Put them together
What a funky bad ass Jew

We got Harvey Keitel
And flash dancer Jennifer Beals
Yasmine Bleeth from Baywatch is Jewish
And yes her boobs are real

Put on that yarmulka
Its time for Chanukah
2 time Ocsar winning Dustin Hoffmanaka
celebrates Chanukah

O.J. Simpson
Still not a Jew
But guess who is,
The guy who does the voice for Scooby Doo

Bob Dylan was born a Jew
Then he wasn't
but now he's back,
Mary Tyler Moore's husband is Jewish
'Cause we're pretty good in the sack.

Guess who got bar-mitzvahed
On the PGA tour
No I'm not talking about Tiger Woods
I'm talkin' about Mr. Happy Gilmore.

So many Jews are in the show biz
Bruce Springsteen isn't Jewish
But my mother thinks he is.

Tell the world-amanaka
It's time to celebrate Chanukah
It's not pronounced Ch-nakah
The C is silent in Chanukah
So read your hooked on phonica
Get drunk in Tijuanaka
If you really really wannaka
Have a happy happy happy happy Chanukah!


Previously on busblog...